Monday, August 04, 2008

Eight Is Enough

Today, the W left a for weeklong sales training "university" for her new job. It's been eight years since she last had this kind of freedom away from me and the kids. Ever since becoming parents, one of us has always been with them—and never away from them for more than a day or two. So for her this is new kind of break: substantial... and overdue.

This time is different for me, too. I'm home... alone. The grandparents have taken the kids for the week so that I don't have to take days off from work. So we're all getting breathers from each other.

I call these breaks "getting your brain back" because that's what it feels like to me during business trips. Knowing the kids are safe and that I do not have to concern myself with any aspect of parenting feels good on the surface—and that's often a pleasure (even a guilty one). I haven't read up what neurobiologists have learned about how your brain physically changes when you become a parent—it seems like it must. And I bet they use the scientific word for "mushy."

I'd also like to know what changes when you have a controlled break. Do the parts associated with worry and doubt go dim? Do the parts associated with peace, quiet, and unrestricted web surfing light up like the streets of Vegas? Science must have the answers...

So what am I doing with my own days of freedom? Well, there's an office to organize for the first time since we moved here two years ago. And there are parts of the yard I still haven't seen completely (it's less than a quarter acre!). So I'll be trying to make some progress—and that's good.

But what's best is pretending it's just me again (even for just a few moments at a time)...

But it sure is quiet here. And I miss her... and them...

She get's back in eight days... and that is enough.


Tweet Wannabes...
We've never hired a babysitter. Meaning, only family members have ever watched the kids. We don't think of ourselves as overprotective, we just have enough risk-aversion (and some laziness) to keep us from hiring somebody... (or we're cheap)

The W's training is in Minnesota and she said, "I want to get some sports jerseys for the boys. What teams are good there?" Me: "Um... well... maybe they'd like kazoos."

It's been so long since I opened the liquor cabinet that it got stuck and I had to pry the damn thing open. Now I've left the bottle of JD sitting on the counter as casually as it might in Michael Anthony's house...

4 comments:

Jennifer said...

Hubs and I have never hired a babysitter, either. So, if you're overprotective, or lazy, or cheap, then we are, too. I'm with you on the risk averse thing. Do I really want a teenager who can barely take care of him/herself watching my six month old and my (often) obnoxious three year old? I think not. Besides, I work at a school, so the teenagers I'm around are the students in my school. Do I want them knowing how messy my house is? Or finding where my husband hides his Playboys so the kids don't find them? Or that I (always) have alcohol in the house?

Ummmm....no.

And, I'm going to a conference in South Carolina in November. Interesting how I'm already getting excited about something that five years ago I would have thought "meh" about. I mean, it's a week with Web site and database geeks. Can't really get your schwerve on with those odds.

Anyway, looking forward to your rants. We all need a space to unload.

Jennifer (aka @CalamityJen)

Kimber said...

Amen for the family watching the kids. Ours have never had a babysitter. It's the in-laws or nothing. And since this blog is private, I can tell you about risk. My husband's cousin was Kristin French, who was abducted here, in this town, the year that I moved to CA. Horrible, scary time. (Go google it. It's all over) Anyway, we are freaks about safety. My husband is worse than I am. (Naturally) Anyway, good to see the blog and JEN? Your husband reads Playboy? ;-)

Kimber said...

Oh, and btw, you're inviting Paper Lisa, arentchoo?

Jennifer said...

OK, Kimber...you gonna front me out on Pee Diddly's blog? You would...wouldn't you.

Alright...since this blog is private...

YES, my husband reads Playboy...for the articles. Yes, I read Playboy...also for the articles. Ahem.

Still whichu on the family-only babysitters.

Oh, and you plannin' on posting about once a month, or what? :-)